Artist: Ugly Kid Joe
Album: As Ugly as They Wanna Be
Release Year: 1991
Genres: hard rock, thrash
1) Madman; 2) Whiplash Liquor; 3) Too Bad; 4) Everything About You; 5) Sweet Leaf/Funky Fresh Country Club; 6) Heavy Metal.
Best Song: Madman
I found this CD at Pawn America for a dollar, and as soon as I saw the cover I had to have it. And, just as the cover suggests, this is about the dumbest, trashiest-sounding 90's rock you're likely to come by. But it's also a lot of fun, even though you may feel ashamed of yourself before it ends.
Imagine Guns 'n' Roses, early-nineties Metallica, and KISS spitting out some sort of musical offspring, and you might have something resembling Ugly Kid Joe. The tunes are catchy, no matter how ridiculously campy they all are. It's like they took all the bad rock cliches and inflated them to cosmic proportions, and still managed to be listenable. Maybe the whole thing is actually an elaborate satire on the mouth-breathers who take this stuff seriously! But probably not.
The lyrics are braindead too, like something out of a preteen comic book or something. It's nothing but insanity, drugs, and murder, but then again, that about all this genre can manage. This kind of music is what a fourteen-year-old wannabe rebel would think was cool. And it's that very same juvenile spirit that makes it so much damn fun. Who's gonna deny the fun in a simple, head-banging chorus like "too bad, too bad, too bad too bad Johnny, whatcha gonna do?" Or lines like "I hate your daddy's guts too, boo-hoo" in "Everything About You?" It's a perfect example of "so bad it's good."
The bass in track five is kinda cool, but I can never remember how the rest actually goes. I do know that seven minutes is too long for this type of music, though. Hell, four is even too long on repulsive, pseudo-rap-metal tripes like "Whiplash Liquor," but at least that one gets you a few cheap laughs. I give the prize to "Madman," thanks to its rip-roarin' chorus and nice guitar solo.
So grab this if you want a cheap thrill, or even to entertain your less-than-brilliant friends. And, who knows- you might find yourself wanting to spin this once in a while...
Rating: 6
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Led Zeppelin IV
Artist: Led Zeppelin
Album: Led Zeppelin IV
Release Year: 1971
Genres: hard rock, art-rock, blues-rock
1) Black Dog; 2) Rock & Roll; 3) The Battle of Evermore; 4) Stairway to Heaven; 5) Misty Mountain Hop; 6) Four Sticks; 7) Going to California; 8) When the Levee Breaks.
Best Song: well, that's the very definition of "obvious," isn't it?
That's right, I called it "Led Zeppelin IV," instead of "Untitled" or "Zoso"or whatever weird name the diehards like to tack onto it. I like the chronological names, because they reflect the band's slow progression from heavy blues to big, bloated, immortal anthems like these. And, as soon as the numerical names stopped, the music also took a longer leap than it ever had before. I mean, you can't tell me Houses of the Holy sounds anything like the first four, can you?
(GET ON WITH IT!!!)
Alright. The fact that this contains "Stairway to Heaven" hardly gains it any "subjectivity points," does it? But this is, without question, the biggest, boldest album the band would ever release. Everything that made Led Zeppelin who they were, they poured on triple thick on this album, effectively undermining any amateur critic's attempt at analyzing it outside the band's popular image. Fortunately for me, when I heard the album, I had only a passing familiarity with Zeppelin, so I was a blank slate for about five of these songs. It didn't take me long to reach my verdict, either: Five of them kick astronomical amounts of ass...and the other three suck.
I would like to take this album as a whole when reviewing it, but it just doesn't lend itself to that kind of analysis. Why? Partially because it's not an intelligent album, but mainly because each song has such a HUGE identity that it's impossible to ignore any one in particular. It kicks off with "Black Dog," a heavy, plodding blues number with a great distorted riff and an even better solo. Who wouldn't want to stomp their foot to that beat and sing along with the braindead lyrics like "Hey hey mama, when you shake that thing, gonna make you burn gonna make you sting"? "Rock & Roll" is even better, though; that incessant drum pattern and rollicking melody, combined with Plant's frantic delivery, make it one of the most energizing, feel-good songs I know.
Unfortunately, this is where we run into trouble. "The Battle of Evermore" is incredibly pretentious, has no coherent melody, and its six minutes consist of just as much wailing as singing. I'm all for Tolkien references, but they have to do his work justice. This one does not. "Misty Mountain Hop" is a bit more listenable, but it's twice as stupid. That keyboard riff is just embarrassing to listen to--you're Led Zeppelin, for crying out loud! You can't mix off-rhythm lyrics with synth loops that make me think of bunnies jumping back and forth, and then think something good will come of it. As for "Four Sticks," which comes next, I can't even remember how it goes, but I do remember it bored me slightly less. Alright, so Bonzo could play with four sticks. We all know he was good. We also know rock songs based on drumming alone tend not to be very good.
"Going to California" really redeems the album, though. It's a simple guitar and mandolin (?) ballad, and Plant's singing actually suits it! I'd always thought he could only do heavy songs, but this one made me reconsider. Then we close with "When the Levee Breaks," which Led Zeppelin did NOT write, but they did make it theirs. The beat pounds along as if to crush the listener, while the guitar and harmonica give it a "sharper" edge as well. The impending breaking of the levee doesn't just mean flood anymore--it seems to mean the end of the world. This isn't just blues. This is doom.
Yeah, that's a nine down there, alright. 3/8 of the album may suck, but the rest is just so friggin' incredible that it gets a nine anyway. And that about wraps up the...oh, wait. I didn't mention "Stairway to Heaven" yet. Uh, well...it's "Stairway to Heaven." That's it. I'm done.
Rating: 9
Album: Led Zeppelin IV
Release Year: 1971
Genres: hard rock, art-rock, blues-rock
1) Black Dog; 2) Rock & Roll; 3) The Battle of Evermore; 4) Stairway to Heaven; 5) Misty Mountain Hop; 6) Four Sticks; 7) Going to California; 8) When the Levee Breaks.
Best Song: well, that's the very definition of "obvious," isn't it?
That's right, I called it "Led Zeppelin IV," instead of "Untitled" or "Zoso"or whatever weird name the diehards like to tack onto it. I like the chronological names, because they reflect the band's slow progression from heavy blues to big, bloated, immortal anthems like these. And, as soon as the numerical names stopped, the music also took a longer leap than it ever had before. I mean, you can't tell me Houses of the Holy sounds anything like the first four, can you?
(GET ON WITH IT!!!)
Alright. The fact that this contains "Stairway to Heaven" hardly gains it any "subjectivity points," does it? But this is, without question, the biggest, boldest album the band would ever release. Everything that made Led Zeppelin who they were, they poured on triple thick on this album, effectively undermining any amateur critic's attempt at analyzing it outside the band's popular image. Fortunately for me, when I heard the album, I had only a passing familiarity with Zeppelin, so I was a blank slate for about five of these songs. It didn't take me long to reach my verdict, either: Five of them kick astronomical amounts of ass...and the other three suck.
I would like to take this album as a whole when reviewing it, but it just doesn't lend itself to that kind of analysis. Why? Partially because it's not an intelligent album, but mainly because each song has such a HUGE identity that it's impossible to ignore any one in particular. It kicks off with "Black Dog," a heavy, plodding blues number with a great distorted riff and an even better solo. Who wouldn't want to stomp their foot to that beat and sing along with the braindead lyrics like "Hey hey mama, when you shake that thing, gonna make you burn gonna make you sting"? "Rock & Roll" is even better, though; that incessant drum pattern and rollicking melody, combined with Plant's frantic delivery, make it one of the most energizing, feel-good songs I know.
Unfortunately, this is where we run into trouble. "The Battle of Evermore" is incredibly pretentious, has no coherent melody, and its six minutes consist of just as much wailing as singing. I'm all for Tolkien references, but they have to do his work justice. This one does not. "Misty Mountain Hop" is a bit more listenable, but it's twice as stupid. That keyboard riff is just embarrassing to listen to--you're Led Zeppelin, for crying out loud! You can't mix off-rhythm lyrics with synth loops that make me think of bunnies jumping back and forth, and then think something good will come of it. As for "Four Sticks," which comes next, I can't even remember how it goes, but I do remember it bored me slightly less. Alright, so Bonzo could play with four sticks. We all know he was good. We also know rock songs based on drumming alone tend not to be very good.
"Going to California" really redeems the album, though. It's a simple guitar and mandolin (?) ballad, and Plant's singing actually suits it! I'd always thought he could only do heavy songs, but this one made me reconsider. Then we close with "When the Levee Breaks," which Led Zeppelin did NOT write, but they did make it theirs. The beat pounds along as if to crush the listener, while the guitar and harmonica give it a "sharper" edge as well. The impending breaking of the levee doesn't just mean flood anymore--it seems to mean the end of the world. This isn't just blues. This is doom.
Yeah, that's a nine down there, alright. 3/8 of the album may suck, but the rest is just so friggin' incredible that it gets a nine anyway. And that about wraps up the...oh, wait. I didn't mention "Stairway to Heaven" yet. Uh, well...it's "Stairway to Heaven." That's it. I'm done.
Rating: 9
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)